Men and Porn

[XiaMin]

So I have some questions about the secret stash. (mainly for the older/long term partnered up men but anyone can pitch in)

First of all, does everyone even have a stash? whether magazines, dvd's or a backup harddrive?

Why, if you've got a partner, maintain the stash? Nostalgia (sp?), an idea well? something to have that's just for you? I mean I like some porn and am definately not closed minded or prudish but I've never felt the need to save or collect anything I've seen. Revisiting the fantasy or images mentally, sure, but a collection, I don't see the point since my memory works just fine.

Even if you and your partner are open and cool with porn, do men still maintain a secret secret stash?

Is a man's taste in porn really a window to his sexual soul?

Do you ever try to incorporate the things you see in porn into everyday life? Ever try to pass them off as your own original idea? lol Or is there a line between fantasy and reality?

I've kept notebooks i've never written in (because they were too cool looking or whatever) and shoes i've never worn, but i don't think it's quite the same thing. (and yes I am a grown ass woman) :P

[Ghettopunkrocker]

So I have some questions about the secret stash. (mainly for the older/long term partnered up men but anyone can pitch in)

Q:First of all, does everyone even have a stash? whether magazines, dvd's or a backup harddrive?
A: I've been developing my porn stash since I was about 14-15. A lot of stuff either got deleted or backed up because I lost interest or it was taking up space. It's kind of like how people have CDs they don't listen to anymore and just trade 'em in for there musical taste of the moment.

Q: Why, if you've got a partner, maintain the stash? Nostalgia (sp?), an idea well? something to have that's just for you? I mean I like some porn and am definately not closed minded or prudish but I've never felt the need to save or collect anything I've seen. Revisiting the fantasy or images mentally, sure, but a collection, I don't see the point since my memory works just fine.

A: That's a good question, I keep a stash mainly on my computer because well I admit, I don't want "White Girls Fucked Silly by Big Black Dudes" on my bank card statement. I had a stash of vids that I taped off of bootleg cable Spice Channel but taped over realizing that shit was censored. I mean, seriously, what's the point of censored porn? To me, porn is like any other medium and/ or vice. If you want to get rid of it, then okay. But, if not cool. To me, some guys getting rid of there porno stash is like throwing out your music collection because your mate doesn't like your taste in music.

Q: Even if you and your partner are open and cool with porn, do men still maintain a secret secret stash?
A: Nope. The missus knows about my stash and it's not a problem so.

Q: Is a man's taste in porn really a window to his sexual soul?
A: That's a good question...yes and no. I see some titles/genres etc. as a sociological experiment. The people that are participating in some hardcore activity that would make Larry Flynt blush as almost a metaphor for the self-deprecation, greed and other factors in our culture. It's almost like transgressive art. I mean, what's the difference between titles like "Fuck My Dirty Shit Hole" to some of the transgressive works of Richard Kern and Nick Zedd?

Q: Do you ever try to incorporate the things you see in porn into everyday life? Ever try to pass them off as your own original idea? lol Or is there a line between fantasy and reality?
A: Y'know, this is another great question. In a weird way, porn has kind of become mainstream. I mean, you have Traci Lords in mainstream movies, Ron Jeremy doing talk show appearances, Jenna Jameson in ad campaigns. But, I digress, thing is, there's nothing new. Nothing is original. There might be some new trends, but there aren't any acts that are new, just new people to try them. Porn, just like mainstream films are an exaggeration if not a caricature of people's desires.

On the old board there was a questionnaire about member's sex lives and most of the stuff sounded like something out of a XXX feature. Think of this, this is from there lives, they aren't being paid for it and some of the hardcore acts seem to get them off. So, in a way, unless it was based off of something they've seen, it's been done. people are more perverted than they realize of want people to know. The difference is, more people are more open about it.

[XiaMin]

Thanks for the response, good answers. I never thought about it like a CD collection, that makes a lot of sense. I don't see the point in censored porn either lol. I like the comparison of porn to transgressive art. I agree too that porn has become almost mainstream, I mean how else do you explain all those "Porn Star" stickers and shirts a while back? LOL you're right....nothing is original.



Ghettopunkrocker said:

So I have some questions about the secret stash. (mainly for the older/long term partnered up men but anyone can pitch in)

Q:First of all, does everyone even have a stash? whether magazines, dvd's or a backup harddrive?
A: I've been developing my porn stash since I was about 14-15. A lot of stuff either got deleted or backed up because I lost interest or it was taking up space. It's kind of like how people have CDs they don't listen to anymore and just trade 'em in for there musical taste of the moment.

Q: Why, if you've got a partner, maintain the stash? Nostalgia (sp?), an idea well? something to have that's just for you? I mean I like some porn and am definately not closed minded or prudish but I've never felt the need to save or collect anything I've seen. Revisiting the fantasy or images mentally, sure, but a collection, I don't see the point since my memory works just fine.

A: That's a good question, I keep a stash mainly on my computer because well I admit, I don't want "White Girls Fucked Silly by Big Black Dudes" on my bank card statement. I had a stash of vids that I taped off of bootleg cable Spice Channel but taped over realizing that shit was censored. I mean, seriously, what's the point of censored porn? To me, porn is like any other medium and/ or vice. If you want to get rid of it, then okay. But, if not cool. To me, some guys getting rid of there porno stash is like throwing out your music collection because your mate doesn't like your taste in music.

Q: Even if you and your partner are open and cool with porn, do men still maintain a secret secret stash?
A: Nope. The missus knows about my stash and it's not a problem so.

Q: Is a man's taste in porn really a window to his sexual soul?
A: That's a good question...yes and no. I see some titles/genres etc. as a sociological experiment. The people that are participating in some hardcore activity that would make Larry Flynt blush as almost a metaphor for the self-deprecation, greed and other factors in our culture. It's almost like transgressive art. I mean, what's the difference between titles like "Fuck My Dirty Shit Hole" to some of the transgressive works of Richard Kern and Nick Zedd?

Q: Do you ever try to incorporate the things you see in porn into everyday life? Ever try to pass them off as your own original idea? lol Or is there a line between fantasy and reality?
A: Y'know, this is another great question. In a weird way, porn has kind of become mainstream. I mean, you have Traci Lords in mainstream movies, Ron Jeremy doing talk show appearances, Jenna Jameson in ad campaigns. But, I digress, thing is, there's nothing new. Nothing is original. There might be some new trends, but there aren't any acts that are new, just new people to try them. Porn, just like mainstream films are an exaggeration if not a caricature of people's desires.

On the old board there was a questionnaire about member's sex lives and most of the stuff sounded like something out of a XXX feature. Think of this, this is from there lives, they aren't being paid for it and some of the hardcore acts seem to get them off. So, in a way, unless it was based off of something they've seen, it's been done. people are more perverted than they realize of want people to know. The difference is, more people are more open about it.

[Daoud]

I have stash I don't check much because I've run the best parts into the ground & into my memory. I may sell / toss them, not sure now.

No partner right now.

I couldn't incorporate porn into everyday life or I'd probably get fired:
Me: Hey Jenny!
Jenny, teacher at school: Hey Daoud!
Me: Damn, your ass is looking good in that skirt...
Jenny: Well what are waiting for? Quick before the students arrive (moaning & slapping sounds)...
Hahaha, buggin' but I have taken a few notes from Devlin, Byron & Sean. It's no different than learning dance moves but you don't call you best friend over to your house to show you how to hit it from the back the same way you would to learn Moonwalk. And whether on the dancefloor or in the bedroom, I don't think you need to announce "this move was originated by Micheal Jackson/Jada Fire/Mr. Marcus/Paula Abdul..."

I kinda think some softcore instructional videos should be provided/sold at a teenage level for safety for STDs, birth control and intimacy. There are enough unitimate & unsafe messages sent out there on the daily for the youth, some counter to that should be availiable.

[Dj Complex]

Porn is fab.....
I have a projector....
and i like to play vintage black porn.....
at partys I host.....
Porn is not that big of a deal.....
sometimes while im cleaning up I put a porn on
and turn the sound down while im cleaning....
my condo.....

[Afrokitty]

damn i need to get the invite to those parties! lol j/k...

Dj Complex said:

Porn is fab.....
I have a projector....
and i like to play vintage black porn.....
at partys I host.....
Porn is not that big of a deal.....
sometimes while im cleaning up I put a porn on
and turn the sound down while im cleaning....
my condo.....

[XiaMin]

Daoud said:

Hahaha, buggin' but I have taken a few notes from Devlin, Byron & Sean. It's no different than learning dance moves but you don't call you best friend over to your house to show you how to hit it from the back the same way you would to learn Moonwalk. And whether on the dancefloor or in the bedroom, I don't think you need to announce "this move was originated by Micheal Jackson/Jada Fire/Mr. Marcus/Paula Abdul..."<</b>BR>
I kinda think some softcore instructional videos should be provided/sold at a teenage level for safety for STDs, birth control and intimacy. There are enough unitimate & unsafe messages sent out there on the daily for the youth, some counter to that should be availiable.

ROFLMBAO! *Imagines that convo.... I never thought of it that way, you are right! Gotta learn somewhere. At first I was thinking it was like plagarism b/c there was a certain move that one guy claimed as his own creation. I was impressed...until I ran across it years later in a porno! I was shocked and all I could think was "Liar!" Here I was thinking I was the beneficiary of an exclusive move. Ha!
As for the softcore instructional, I agree it's a good idea but I doubt it will ever come to light.

[Tapedek]

I keep my stash inside the floor and when I pull the right book from my case it automatically lifts up. LOL..

Nah, I keep a box underneath the bed (juvenile, I know.. I know..) and two inside the DVD crate so when girls come over and see it they have an option..

1. Know EXACTLY what I'm thinking and hoping will go down and be cool with it. Or
2. Run like hell..

[Dj Complex]

Gurl.....you know you want to come to a Complex party......
we be buggin out.....
I dont want to "toot" my own horn
but....
i've been known to throw pretty good partys !

Afrokitty said:

damn i need to get the invite to those parties! lol j/k...

Dj Complex said:

Porn is fab.....
I have a projector....
and i like to play vintage black porn.....
at partys I host.....
Porn is not that big of a deal.....
sometimes while im cleaning up I put a porn on
and turn the sound down while im cleaning....
my condo.....

[Ken-K]

First of all, does everyone even have a stash? whether magazines, dvd's or a backup harddrive?
I still have a lot of burned CDs and flash drives worth of stuff, but I usually just stick to the streaming sites, now.

Why, if you've got a partner, maintain the stash? Nostalgia (sp?), an idea well? something to have that's just for you?
Anyone can tell you, having a partner doesn't automatically mean "Sex OnDemand". Even your relationship with someone revolves solely around sex, that person may not be around when you need to get off. And yes, definitely for ideas. The worst thing you can do when it comes to sex is fall into a routine. Porn's a good way to find new things to do.

Even if you and your partner are open and cool with porn, do men still maintain a secret secret stash?
My ex and I used to watch porn regularly, and while she had her preferences, she was always into whatever I liked, so no need for a secret secret stash, just for myself.

Is a man's taste in porn really a window to his sexual soul?
It depends. I like just about anything as far as standard porn goes. I just like to see moderately to especially attractive people fuck.

Do you ever try to incorporate the things you see in porn into everyday life? Ever try to pass them off as your own original idea? lol Or is there a line between fantasy and reality?
Trying to pass anything in porn off as an original idea, unless your partner was profoundly naive sexually until y'all hooked up, is pointless. As far as everyday life, that's pretty broad. It's not like I pump gas, and pull out before the tank is full and spray the back of my car, if that's what you mean!

[XiaMin]

Ken-K said: As far as everyday life, that's pretty broad. It's not like I pump gas, and pull out before the tank is full and spray the back of my car, if that's what you mean!
OH GOD! That brought tears to my eyes! ROFLMBAO!

[kifaru]

I had a secret stash and it satayed around when I was with someone and when I wasn't. My stash started of secret when I was young and my parents made me think it was wrong to have even thought they had it around. One girlfriend found out about it and made me feel so ashamed I was like I can't show her this so I hid it. Another was like "Come on. Let's look at a nasty movie." It was out in the open for her.

Porn let me see things that I hadn't seen. It satisfied my curiosity about what different looking womens bodies looked like. What do mixed black chinese womens bodies look like? Look for a porno with one. What do South Indian womens bodies look like. Look for a porno with one. I liked the fantasy aspect of it. Probably if I could have gotten to some of those places with exotic women I would have tried to find a girlfriend and try it out. Sexual curiosity is a hell of thing you know. To a certain extent it was a window into my sexual soul because I always wanted to know what something different was like.

My opinion of it started to change about 3 years ago. Someone on the old forum started a thread on exploitation of women. It made me really examine whether or not my habit was pushing women into the sex trade. Do I want my female relative doing that? No. Ok, in that case I shouldn't be supporting an industry that is promoting that as a respectable way to earn a living. I got saved and then I got rid of all of it. To each his own.

[Obsidian]

I know this thread is about men and porn, but I must inject my two cents.

Women have secret porn stashes too. Lol. It may not be hardcore visual stuff, but books seem to do it for me and some women I know. Reading about a character who is attractive (personality, description and plot) is the most vivid of mental porn. Keeping that book around or purchasing the book is how the collection grows. Sometimes I'll take it a step forward and look for online fanfiction. *shrugs* And yea, I have a regular collection of porn. It's of the feminist variety as I really can't stand much of the regular porn produced and how womens desires totally get bitch slapped.